156 FIRST VISIT TO EUROPE. atmosphere of New England. 'V ould you pray for me that Providence may bring me once more to An­dover Seminary? Please let all my things be in An­dover as they now are. TO MRS. HARDY. BERLlll, Dtcember 16, 1872. In regard to my future steps, not hearing from you any further advice, I made a decision not to go home with Mr. Tanaka. Please allow me to give you a reason for my decision. 1st. Mr. Tanaka does not know exactly what position he could get for me, only that he should make use of me by some way. His in­vitation is not authoritative, hut his private opinion. The Japanese government is still unsettled; and if he is replaced in his position, who will be responsible for me? Therefore I will not accept his invitation, for it seems me too much like a child's play. 2d. If I go home now, while I may possibly render some service for our government, I fear my time will be taken up too much for that purpose and cause me delay to com­mence my service to my spiritual sovereign. I feel more and more that I am captured by my Saviour, and shall not be happy if I do not work for my Master. As my theological course is not yet half finished, I would like to resume it until I should be ordained to preach the g·ospel to my benighted countrymen. It was my first choice that I should ever take my cross and follow my Master. It is my happiest choice, and I believe it is the best choice. As you have been my spiritual mother and kind patron thus far, I trust you will still continue your kindness and allow me to pro­mote my study still further. I have been intending to send you some money, which I have saved for my